If I could, I know just I would do

WARNING: This version of this song contains salty lyrics!

Of course I bought a lottery ticket. Despite what the New York Times might tell you, your chances of winning are better if you buy a ticket than if you don’t buy a ticket. I only bought one ticket, and I did not buy the power play (whatever that is.) I don’t really expect to win the lottery, but someone, somewhere will win. What if it was me?

That’s really the value of the ticket, if you ask me. Thinking about what I’d do if I won. I’d move, immediately, to a house with more than one bathroom. I would not want to move out of the neighborhood or to a different city right this minute. I’d just want a second bathroom. If that bathroom were en suite with the master bedroom and had two sinks, so much the better. We have a teenager in the house. We need greater bandwidth when it comes to privies.

I have not asked my sweet lady if she would quit her job. Tallulah would have to stay in school, of course, because I don’t want to go to jail. I would definitely stay in school too because:

  1. I’m not in seminary simply for a job. I would have gone to business school at Western Carolina University if that were the motivation.
  2. I want to be a priest in the Episcopal Church.

That was a little bit, but I hope not too much, surprising to my sweet lady. I think she has seen me struggle against my extroverted nature to sit in a room, by myself, and read books. A lot of books. Also, deadlines make me anxious, and school is nothing but deadlines. So why would I keep doing that if I had a billion dollars?

Because this is the dream, this going to seminary and becoming a priest thing. It’s kind of a weird dream, but it’s mine. What might change is what type of priest I would become. I’ve seen people in positions responsible for building, or raising funds for, a community who did not really need the job for income. They were independently wealthy or whatever and seemed to have a different perspective on the outcome of their work. They did not have the same amount of skin in the game as the folks who really needed to be successful in order to pay the bills.

So, I would want to be careful about getting into a position of leadership where I did not care about the success or failure of the venture. The again, I might find a whole other reason for caring, some other skin to put into the game. I’d want to give some money away, and I would want to give it to people who are already doing good work instead of founding some new initiative or organization. (I might start a foundation for tax purposes, but I’d hope to keep it simple.) Food banks and mentoring programs could use all the money we have to give them.

The answer to the “what if” question for me is, essentially, “nothing much different.” I’m grateful for that and grateful to the people who have made sacrifices so that I can do this. Three or four years ago, my answer probably would have been quite different. Back then we lived in a house with two bathrooms.