Today’s volume of creativity has been expended on a bathtub. Mine is not an overly tidy household, but the bathrooms do get cleaned bi-annual whether they need it or not. The trouble with this is that, when I do attack a bathroom, I do so with the full force of an alumnus of the Heavy Duty Crew.
Heavy Duty was my first assignment in the People’s Republic of the Valley of Love and Delight. On Heavy Duty, I learned how to clean toilets, fold tables, and carry large stacks of chairs. This type of work does not normally involve great creativity. In fact it is often best to leave thought at a minimum. Once, I was working with another Heavy Duty crew member who scoffed at being told to use “germicidal” cleaning solution.
“There are no such things as germs, you know,” she said.
I was prepared for some hippie-wackness but engaged anyway saying, “Well, there are viruses and bacteria, right?”
“Yeah”
“So, together they are germs, right?”
“Perhaps, but they should be more specific.”
“Well, this isn’t rocket science.”
“But, I’m a rocket scientist,” says she.
“No,” I thought,”you’re a janitor. Just like me.”
That last one I just kept to myself. But you see how it goes. The point is to get the job done. For some areas, however, this means getting creative. Like how do you get the mold off the bottom of the step stool your Sweet Lady uses to shave her legs? Why, a toothbrush and Clorox of course. The bigger issue is why you are looking under the step stool in the first place.
This is the curse of Heavy Duty. Once I stop looking, I can’t stop. Right about now a surgical team is scrubbing in to get their appendectomy under way in my shower. Such levels of cleanliness are not strictly required. But rather than keeping things mostly clean most of the time, I let them get pretty nasty and come through like Sherman through Georgia. Now I’m a bit tuckered out. Big Dummy.