I am not ashamed to say that I shop in big box stores. Wait. I take that back. I am ashamed to shop in big box stores but I do it anyway. They often are both convenient and have what I want. So I go there, as I did the other day to look for a thingy to plug the Touchy into the cigarette lighter in my car. We all know it is a cigarette lighter, not an outlet. Anyway, when the new iOS comes out this fall, I will be able to sync the Touchy over the air, so there will be no need to bring it inside as long as it can charge in the car.
So I went into the one big box place which is usually known for office supplies but they also have electronic crap because dipshits like me will go there to buy stuff. They had something which I bought but it sucked. So I decided I would take it back and try another thing from another place. So I went to the other place and they had gadgety stuff too, even though they also had tee vees and washing machines and shit.
So I’m looking at the gadgety stuff when a nice young lady comes up and asks if I need any help. “No thanks,” sez Sanuk D sezee, but the young lady was not done. “Can I ask you a question?” she asked, her head cocked to one side. Not wanting to be ungentlemanly, I replied “um, sure.” “Do you have satellite or cable?” Shit. I thought she was going to ask if I was a runner. This is a sales call. And she has a wingman. Or wingwoman. Either way they teamed up on me and I started to feel uncomfortable and wonder why I had come into the store in the first place.
And like I said, it’s not a bad store. It could even be a city. Ok, maybe a small city, but still a city. A city not unlike Asheville for instance. People come to Asheville all the time. They love visiting here. They love to express their feelings in prose, poetry, song, and even tweets. Once the love is expressed in tweets, however, be prepared for young ladies to come asking you questions about satellite tee vee. Metaphorically of course. What you will really get is a response something like this one.
There could be worse things in the world. Ok, there are worse things in the world. Do I need to elaborate? No I do not. What I need to do is get over the notion that this will poison everyone in the world to our fair city (although that would cut down on the number of people who ask me for directions while I am trying to go for a run.) What it is more likely to do is turn people off to those accounts and the businesses associated with them. See, I’m still going to the big box store, but I’m sure as hell not getting a satellite tee vee anytime soon.