I’ve been seeing a lot of references to NAMI around lately. On the Twitters. At the Dub. There was even a random sign out on the street. I don’t really think that the Universe acts this way, but do you think the Universe is trying to send me a signal? In case you have not been inundated with the acronym lately, NAMI stands for “National Alliance on Mental Illness.” I do not think God is sending me signals via printed media that I am crazy.
Mostly because I do not think I am crazy. (This is where we enter Catch-22 territory.) Not that people with mental illness are crazy either. That’s a horrible thing to say. So I’m not mentally ill either. Several professionals have told me they were going to use the term “anxiety” just “so I can tell the insurance company something.” Maybe they were trying to keep me from getting worked up about it?
They are nice people those professionals. There is one in particular who is my guy. It has been a while since I have seen him, but he remains my guy. I tried a couple of other guys first, but they did not so much work out. This is the guy. Plus I have the running thing and the staying away from mood altering chemicals thing. Those help, especially when combined with some spiritual disciplines. Kind of like the steroids I put up my nose every morning.
To keep the allergies at bay. That’s what’s with the steroids. My point is this: some forms of mental or emotional illness don’t have to be full blown depression or schizophrenia. I was born with a lazy eye, pigeon feet, allergies, and a bit of anxiety. I also got some pretty amazing hair, so things sort of even out. They had to tie my heels together when I was a baby, and I got eye surgery at 5. I wear glasses and take a Zyrtec everyday. It’s not always so clear what to do about the anxiety, but the fact that it is there is no more alarming than the fact that Ben Affleck’s coiffure goes flat next to mine.